I Gave My Grandma a Break Today

My heart breaks for my grandmother she is old she is ill Her memory is fading Along with what seems to be the scraps left of her sanity. Walking is difficult eating is difficult living is difficult. Though she spires me with bitter words full of rancor I must forgive her for she knows not what she says. My heart breaks for my grandmother because I am short with her. My temper is hot. But she knows not what she says. She knows not what she says. How awful it must be to watch the line between reality and fantasy … Continue reading I Gave My Grandma a Break Today

Cork

I tried again to write about you today but I found myself at a lost for words like usual. Now I can’t help but wonder If this is more than just writers block maybe my heart is blocked and the words can’t be pumped out. You were once a cork that filled the craters in my fragile heart. Now thoughts of you restrain my heart from beating out the words that can set me free. Continue reading Cork

Pardon Me…

I don’t mean to be a bother but my heart is splintering and fragments of broken glass are scratching the walls of my hollow chest and I was wondering if you had some glue. I know it’s late but demons in the form of thoughts of you race around my mind threatening to drive me insane and I was wondering if you could perform an exorcism. I know you gave up but every shallow breath that I drag into my decrepit lungs reminds me of how much I don’t want to be alive and I was wondering if you had … Continue reading Pardon Me…

Heartbreak Dialogue

“It’s late.” “I know… I know” “You should be sleeping” How can I sleep? How can I sleep when thoughts of you race around my mind like hamsters on a wheel? How can I sleep? How can I sleep when memories threaten to slice my head in half? “I cannot sleep.” “Try” How can I try? How can I try when every time I shut my eyes, pictures of you haunt me, reminding me of the mistakes I made? “I miss you.” “It’s late.” Continue reading Heartbreak Dialogue

Long Night

Thoughts Race around my mind In this endless game of ping pong My eyes close And whip back open No sleep tonight The demons are ravaging my mind Must keep busy Must keep busy So I’ll twiddle my thumbs do whatever I can To keep my itching Fingers From clawing My beating heart Right out of my chest Can’t sleep Can’t sleep Tick tock Tick tock The longer I stay awake The louder the demons Get Tick tock Tick tock Can’t sleep Won’t sleep Continue reading Long Night

The Endless Wait

I’m okay I’m fine I’m going to sleep and I’ll wake up tomorrow with hope in my fast beating heart and I’ll flip my phone over and click it on and I’ll have dozens of notifications. But none of them will be from you. So none of them will matter. But I’ll still rush to unlock my phone and double check to make sure because what if what if… what if nothing. There’s nothing there. Nothing. And I’ll spend the whole day double triple quintuple checking. I’ll spend the whole day “What if-ing” And there will be nothing there. Nothing. … Continue reading The Endless Wait

I Don’t Like Summer

I never liked summer Because summer means Free time Alone time free time means Sitting Waiting For the reply that will Never come because you actually have a life whereas mine revolves around waiting for you Sitting Waiting For you to care like I do But you never will. Summers make me The ultimate dumpee Because I will always be Here when you return Sitting Waiting Continue reading I Don’t Like Summer

Me Before You

I used to be poet Then I got rid of my muse My frown turned up side Down No longer singing the blues But now my hands ache for A pen and my fingers itch Longing to type I knew this wouldn’t last I knew this happiness would pass And now my poetry Is tinged with the same Hopeless longing Lack of sense of belonging That I’m used to. Heartbreaks back baby You miss me? The darkness has found a leak And now the sadness can seep Back into my soul Fragmenting my being With its acidic nature Until I … Continue reading Me Before You

Pretty or Dying

And here’s the tragic tale Of modern society No one comes running To aid the uglies And the cries of the healthies Are left unheard Because no one cares Believe me Absolutely no one cares Unless your eyebrows are perfect Your lips are plump Your waist is non existent And your butt length hair Curves and curls Just the right way Or your last breath has been Determined Or everyone knows “You don’t have much time” Because no one cares Unless you’re pretty Or dying Continue reading Pretty or Dying